The Key to Maintaining Good Mental Health for Moms

The Key to Maintaining Good Mental Health for Moms

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Being a mom is amazing, but it’s also a lot.

Like A LOT.

Especially when you’ve got little ones running around, the noise never stops, the mess never ends, and the to-do list magically grows longer every time you blink.

Some days, you wonder how you’re supposed to keep it together. You’re definitely not alone—I have no doubt every mom wonders this regularly.

The truth is, maintaining good mental health as a mom isn’t about doing more—it’s about doing less and cutting yourself some slack along the way.

The Pressure to “Do It All” Is Real—And Unrealistic

Woman screaming
Trying to do it all makes me want to scream! Photo by Andrea Piacquadio

We live in a world where picture-perfect parenting fills every social media feed. The matching outfits. The organic meals. The spotless homes. But here’s what you need to know: what you see online isn’t real life. It’s curated content—not anyone’s everyday.

And you know what? I’m done with it.

Trying to measure up to those filtered images can leave you feeling defeated, anxious, and exhausted. So here’s my advice for maintaining good mental health as a mom:

Lower your expectations. And then lower them again.

Yes, really. Let go of the idea that you need to do it all, all the time. You are not a failure because your toddler watched a show while you drank hot coffee. You are not failing because you didn’t get to the laundry or because dinner was frozen pizza.

The real failure? Believing you need to be perfect to be a good mom.

Your kids will not look back on their childhoods and wish they hadn’t eaten those chicken nuggets or watched that extra episode of Bluey.

They’ll remember that you were happy and you did fun things together.

How to Lower Your Expectations (Without Guilt)

Woman with her children. All look happy to be together
There’s no need for guilt around self care when it helps your family, too. Photo by Elina Fairytale

This isn’t about giving up—it’s about getting real. Start by asking yourself:

  • What really matters today?
  • What can I let go of?
  • What would help me feel a little more like me?

That’s how you learn how to lower your expectations in a way that feels freeing, not lazy.

If you need permission to do less, here it is: You are doing enough. You are enough. You won’t remember in a month that you didn’t fold the laundry right away. Your kids won’t either.

And when you start letting go of the pressure, you’ll feel the shift. You’ll have more space to breathe, to connect with your kids, and to check in with yourself—which brings us to the next piece of the puzzle.

Why Self Care Isn’t Selfish (It’s Essential)

Woman smiling while reading a book
Self care is a must, even when it feels like you don’t have the time. Photo by Freepik

Let’s connect the dots: When you give yourself permission to rest, say no, or ask for help, you’re not only protecting your own good mental health, you’re creating a healthier environment for your kids.

Kids don’t need a perfect mom—they need a mom who’s present. And presence comes a lot more easily when you’re not running on empty.

Want to improve mental health as a mom? Start here:

  • Lower the bar (yep, again)
  • Ditch the guilt
  • Build tiny moments of care into your day
  • Laugh more
  • Let the mess wait

I got to a point after my second child that I looked at my husband and told him I was working my way toward depression. I felt like I had nothing for myself and was just running through the motions of motherhood every day.

After that conversation, we made a point to figure out how to get some self care in my days. It took some time, but I feel like I’ve struck a good balance.

So, don’t expect this to happen right away. This will be a journey that will take time for you to feel comfortable.

And don’t forget: It’s okay to have bad days. You don’t have to be sunshine and patience 24/7. What matters is that you care—and that’s already a sign of a great mom.

Mental Health Matters—For You and Your Family

So many moms put their well-being on the back burner. But here’s the truth: Mental health matters, not just for the sake of your family, but for you. You’re a whole person, not just a caregiver.

Taking care of your mental health isn’t a luxury—it’s survival. It’s thriving. It’s being able to find joy in motherhood even on the messy, loud, exhausting days.

Make it part of your routine. Check in with yourself. Ask for help when you need it. Look for ways to breathe, move, rest, and laugh. These small habits are the key to long-term good mental health.

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